Monday, December 7, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
So, with a long week in the works I'm finding it almost impossible to stay on track. Why? Because the television's calling my name. Odd for me, since I almost never actually watch tv, but there you have it. Between my newfound obsession with NCIS (Gibbs is amazing) and the fact that I just discovered Castle with Nathan Fillion (Mal, from Firefly) I've spent most of the last week vegging in front of the boob tube.
Yes, it's pathetic. Sue me.
So I have to ask everyone, what's your solution for the weeks when nothing sounds so good as curling up in front of a good movie? When you can't snap your mind back into gear to do the things you know you need to do? When the only thing you want to do is curl up inside someone else's world for a little while and pretend your own doesn't exist?
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Thursday, November 5, 2009
Anyway, the plague has lifted around here. The kittens are tearing around the house, my kids are enjoying their first of two half days (the reason for the teacher conference-or maybe the conference was the reason for the half day, however you want to look at) and I'm working on getting work caught up before I take Chelsea to ballet. Just another day in paradise.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Of course, we were waiting for pizza too, which made it a little better. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I can be bought.
The good news is, for everyone that had to listen to me complain yesterday, last night was rockin'. I got home, ate WAY too much pizza. My hubby went out and bought me an apple danish instead of a lame birthday cake, and we had that with some ice cream. I knocked out a little more work, then took a quick 2 mile run (more about that in a minute) before sitting down and gorging myself on Disc 3 of the first season of NCIS.
Gibbs is an ass. Abby's awesome. Tony's a hound dog. Duckey's just-strange. Kate's too sweet for her own good. And I'm totally hooked.
The only downside to yesterday was that we had to cancel our plans to take our first "couple's jog" while the kiddies were in school, since, well, none of them went to school! See, for a few months now I've been training off and on for the annual Turkey Trot, an 8K race that happens in Rochester every year. I was doing really good training through the summer, then I went back to work and it was downhill from there.
With three weeks to go 'til post, however, I'm kicking up the routine. I can do 8 miles at a steady 15 minute mile, which means I should be able to handle five miles without too much pain. It might not be a fast five miles, but I can do it! I've also dropped 5 lbs. in the past couple of weeks, which is just-cool. Yes, I know, when you're training for a race it's not about weight. It's about fitness, and time, and being able to go the distance.
But it still feels good.
Anyway, I'm pulling a night shift tonight so I have to rock and roll. The price I pay for spending the morning running errands. Have a good night everyone!
Monday, November 2, 2009
I'm just complaining. All three kids have the flu. We had to cancel Halloween. (More or less-I still got some great pictures though!) And now it's Monday, and they're still home sick. It's my birthday, and I get to spend it taking the car to the shop, the kid to the doctor, the cats to the vet and my computer to the nearest FedEx location to send it back to HP to stop that annoying little flicking thing. No flowers. No cake.
Can I just fast forward through 27 and get to the good stuff?
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Think about it. Ladies, how often have you walking into a store and picked up a brand new tube of mascara, only to have it turn out to be no good two or three weeks down the road because it's so chunky and dry you can barely do it? Now, I don't know diddly squat about how they make mascara, but I have to imagine being able to withhold the ingredients that make it thick and chunky until you're good and ready to use it could only be a good thing!
What do you think?
Thursday, October 22, 2009
The idea behind the Gizmo is that someone has finally come up with a way to let you mix your drinks at the point of sale instead of having to pick up protein shakes, nutritional drinks and other flavored beverages after they've been sitting on a store shelf for a while and all the flavoring has fallen out of suspension-or worse, taken on that stale, overly watered down taste!
Check it out!
Sunday, October 18, 2009
I believe... that just because two people argue, it doesn't mean they don't love each other and just because they don't argue, it doesn't mean they do love each other.
I believe... that we don't have to change friends if we understand that friends change.
I believe... that no matter how good a friend is they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.
I believe... that true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love.
I believe... that you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.
I believe... that it's taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
I believe... that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
I believe... that you can keep going long after you think you can't.
I believe... that we are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
I believe... that either you control your attitude or it controls you.
I believe... that heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.
I believe... that money is a lousy way of keeping score.
I believe... that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I believe... that sometimes, the people you expect to kick you when you're down will be the ones to help you get back up.
I believe... that sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.
I believe... that maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had and what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.
I believe... that it isn't always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
I believe... that no matter how bad your heart is broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief.
I believe... that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
I believe... that you shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
I believe... that two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
I believe... that your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
I believe... that even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.
I believe... that credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
I believe... that the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Buffy: You do remember that you're a vampire, right?
Spike: We like to talk big. Vampires do. "I'm going to destroy the world." That's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood. The truth is, I like this world. You've got... dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people, billions of people walking around like Happy Meals on legs. It's all right here. But then someone comes along with a vision, with a real... passion for destruction. Angel could pull it off. Goodbye, Piccadilly. Farewell, Leicester Bloody Square.
It's time to get that back.
Speaking of old friends and old memories, I spent today up at Longacre Farms in the middle of nowhere with my best friend from middle school. We had a blast. If you ever get the opportunity to swing up that way I highly recommend it. On top of the extremely cool goats and the kickin' Maize Maze (which makes the one in Fredericksburg look hopelessly puny and inferior!) they have this amazing jumping pillow. Picture "The Blob" from Fat Camp, then tack it on the ground over a sand pit and you've got a jumping pillow. This thing was SO amazing. I seriously want one! It's better than a trampoline for giving you a little extra "Oomph", which sends you flying in every direction.
Couple that with a giant slide and I think I had more fun than the kids! There are days I love being a parent. Otherwise people look at you funny when you're 26 and playing pirate on a giant wooden pirate ship! I can't wait until we get to do it again. Next up?
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
"Life Less Ordinary"
Live a life less ordinary
Live a life extraordinary with me
Live a life less sedentary
Live a life evolutionary with me
Well I hate to be a bother,
But it's you and there's no other,
I do believe
You can call me naive but...
I know me very well (at least as far as I can tell)
And I know what I need
The night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me, took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me, shook the bones of me
By the way, I do know why you stayed away...
I will keep tongue-tied next time
Live a life less ordinary
Live a life extraordinary with me
My face had said too much
Before our hands could even touch
To greet a 'hello'(So much for going slow...)
A little later on that yearI told you that I loved you dear
What do you know?
This you weren't prepared to hear
I'm a saddened man, I'm a broken boy
I'm a toddler with a complex toy
I've fallen apart, since the ambush of your heart
The night you came into my life
Well it took the bones of me, took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me, shook the bones of me.
By the way, I do know why you stayed away
I will keep tongue-tied but...
Honey understand, honey understand
I won't make demands
Honey understand, honey understand
We could walk without a plan.
Honey understand (honey), honey understand
I won't rest in stone all alone
Honey understand, honey understand
I'm all ready to go
But you already know...
Live a life less ordinary
Live a life extraordinary with me.
If I could name you in this song
Would it make you smile and sing along?
This is the goal: to get into your soul
If I could make you dance for joy
Could that be the second-chance decoy?
The bird-in-hand I would need
To help you understand?
The night you came into my life, well it took the bones of me, took the bones of me
You blew away my storm and strife
And shook the bones of me, shook the bones of me
By the way, I do know why you stayed away
I will keep tongue-tied next time
Monday, August 3, 2009
Hollow and cold, with the chilling memories
Reminding me what was,
The ache in my heart telling me what is,
And the shadow of your smile
With what might have been.
Plucked like a flower, precious and new
From a tree with roots that span an eternity.
Only you have shared my yesterdays
And it hurts
To see who you've become.
To watch shadows darken eyes
That were meant to shine
And to see a heart so soft
Close against a pain I know
Started and Ended
So many things,
Like a boat in the desert
Or a cat in the ocean.
Where do we go from here?
Tears we've cried,
Words we've spoken
Can't be undone
And must somehow be survived.
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Dude, I see cow people.
Overall, though, things are doing alright. We have slightly crazy but extremely loveable neighbors that spent over an hour this afternoon coloring with my kids. Barbara's outside helping Mike figure out how to set out the trash for the trash people. This is the first time we've had to deal with either trash pick-up or recycling, so it promises to be an experience. Astonishingly, Virginia's slightly backwater (read: cheap) when it comes to that. Go figure. Doesn't surprise me in the least.
I'm venturing out with the kids tomorrow morning to get them registered for school, then Chelsea and I (and probably Garrett) are going to go traveling down to the local dance studio to check things out and get her signed up for classes. I know she's excited and a little nervous about it. I'm looking forward to it. It'll be the first chance she's had to step out and get settled in, and I know she's been bored out of her mind without Taylor, Caleb and Kayla around.
Now I just have to find something for Alex to do. I'm hoping something at the YMCA will spark his interest, although the fact that he spent 7 hours today playing X-Box isn't very encouraging. To be honest, I'm a little nervous about it. He isn't the type to make or keep friends easily, and he rarely goes out and seeks people to play with. I realize he's probably a little young to be a social reject, but that doesn't stop me from being very, very afraid he's going to be the disruptive kid in the class nobody likes. Hopefully a fresh school and a fresh start will be what he needs to get started on the right path. And maybe I'll learn to stop being a paranoid mother and give the kid his space.
Anyway, tonight marks the last night of my vacation (officially). I have to start working half days this week and go back full time next week. Ewwwww. And we're going back to VA this weekend for my brother's wedding. The insanity of that doesn't escape me, believe me! However, having a certain fondness for my inheritance and the babysitting privileges that come with it I need to make sure we're all present and accounted for. And, of course, I wouldn't miss seeing my baby brother tie the knot.
Flipping over to the house, I have to say-I'm in love. It needs work. All right, it needs a LOT of work! I discovered it was built in 1910, however, which is just incredibly cool, and looking around I think most of it's cosmetic. There are places that we absolutely have to rip down the wallpaper and repaint, and my dad tried to do some renovations and got stalled halfway through, but calling in a good contractor and applying a little bit of elbow grease will do wonders. I figure about two more years and we'll be right where we want to be.
So yay! Welcome to New York. Now all I have to do is find a little civilization and some company to keep myself sane and we'll be in good shape.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
So anyone, I took my best friend shopping for a wedding dress today, and we found "the" dress right off the bat. It was amazing. Of course, I'm not going to go into any detail here. You never know when a fiancé is going to be peeking over your virtual shoulder…It took me forever and a year to find mine, and this ironically worked out beautifully because Amy was the one who found my dress. It was a privilege to return the favor. J Chai and a wedding planner later we were rolling. And she asked me to be her Matron of Honor. I'm psyched.
Ladies and gentlemen, it's time to start planning the bachelorette party. Yes, she's not getting married until next year, but it has to be something inspired. This is Amy. She's been waiting for this day forever. The least I can do is use my mad organizational skills to put together a kick-ass bachelorette party for her. Even if I'm planning it from New York! I've got Liz down here to help me set these junks up. The question is, what can I get away with? And what kind of a theme do I want? Oh man, this is going to be harder than I thought.
Let's see what we can come up with. Anyway, I've got two more weeks and then it's time to get rolling with the family blog for Christmas. I'm still not sure about this one, but I think it's going to be a lot of fun.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
With the reality of my move becoming more of a reality and less of an abstract concept, I have to admit-I'm a little intimidated here. In three weeks I have to pack up my entire house (only 1 closet of which is done) and move five people across three states to relocate in a state I'm familiar with but no one else is and which my husband is going to hate after a week or two. I'm just so grateful I have the most awesome friends in the world, several of whom are going to be helping us load up the U-Haul on Thursday and one of which is willingly giving up her weekend to come help me unpack, shop and find some sanity in this new place I'm shortly going to be calling home.
Amy, I love you. Have I told you that lately?
Anyway, with the move approaching faster than I can blink I find myself struggling, for a couple of reasons. One, how on earth am I going to get three weeks ahead on work so I can take some time off to move, and two, how are we going to keep in touch with all the folks back home? And so, as I was haunting the pages of Facebook (which I am disgustingly addicted to these days) I had an idea. I love to blog. Blogging is great. What if I actually keep up with my blog every single day, toss in lots of pictures of the kids, Mike and I getting settled in, keep a steady log of what's going on in our lives and turn it into a book?
Hey, I'm a published author. I can do this…right?
All right, so I'm laying myself open for massive quantities of criticism. And I'm sure my in-laws are going to find it about as dumb as the scrapbooks we made last year out of the kids' school papers (the end of the year version of which I'm still working on, by the way). But you know what? The more I think about it, the more I like the idea. I mean, I love to blog. I LIKE having a record of my life that I don't have to put into a photo album (oh boy, do I ever). And I'm published on the web in six different countries, even if my name isn't always on the item in question.
I can handle a little thing like a daily blog for my family, right?
Let's see how operation "Christmas Insanity" turns out. It may be scrapbooks this year after all!
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Honestly, if we're talking special effects here my only complaint is that it takes the Transformers for...ev...er to transform in the early parts of the movie. I know they're trying to show how incredibly neat it is that they transform, etc, etc, but they did it so much more quickly in the first movie that fans are going to find themselves a little impatient in this one. Or maybe it's just me!
Anyway, so I wasn't expecting much. Boy, was I wrong! The plot in this is rich, if a little trite. Sam has the secret to the continuation of the Transformer race (which actually involves the Decepticons trying to destroy the planet, but is anyone surprised) stuck inside his head, and the newly resurrected Megatron wants to take it all-literally. If you got grossed out by the scene with the squid-like thing in the Matrix, close your eyes. You're in for a slimy surprise.
Friday, June 26, 2009
Monday, June 22, 2009
All right y'all, it's finally happened. The flying car is a reality. THIS IS TOTALLY AWESOME! Someone has actually come up with a plane that can touch down, fold up its little wings and go cruising on down the highway. The idea, the company says, is to create a car that can go around bad weather when the situation calls for it.
Honestly? I think someone was just trying to replicate Star Wars and came up with the next best thing…
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Anyway, all whining aside, the ballet went well. None of the parents knew where the kids were supposed to be, the kids were so wound from spending hours...and hours...and hours in line that they were about to implode by the time they got on stage to perform, somebody knocked an entire bottle of water all over the dressing room floor and they managed to close the curtain too early not once, but twice-once at the beginning of the last act of La Boutique Fantasque ("The Magic Toy Shop) and once on top of Aurora at the end of Sleeping Beauty.
Overall, I'd say it was a smashing success (assuming I could actually find my "m" key, which apparently I can't).
Seriously though, we all had a good time. My daughter's class decked themselves out in Italian tarentella gear and spun around on stage. There was almost a head on collision in the middle of Sleeping Beauty when one of the dancers missed her blocking and cut off another, but I was so busy snickering about the fact that my friend's daughter managed to drop my rather large, rather heavy plastic bracelet on the extremely hard and uncovered floor and send it rolling down between the seats all...the way...to the front of the room to really pay much attention.
The extremely acoustically friendly room, might I add.
Have you ever seen Ray Stevens's "Mississippi Squirrel Revival"? Check it out here. This is EXACTLY what it looked like-minus the laps in the woman's dress, of course! Oh, and the revival. But it was definitely a red, plastic squirrel...
Anyway, the girls were darling, Chelsea had a blast, and it's time to get this summer on the road. Good night all.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Today has been awesome. Exhausting, but awesome. It started out terrible-Garrett wouldn't go to bed last night, so I stayed up way too late and wound up falling asleep on our loveseat. Now, normally this isn't something I'd mind. As a matter of fact, there are many days I go out of my way to fall asleep on my loveseat. It rocks! While a loveseat might have been meant for two people, however, it certainly wasn't meant for three. Not in any position that resembles sleeping, at any rate! About halfway through my 300th episode of Buffy (okay, not really, but I was so tired it even felt like it to me!) I was dozing in and out of sleep in a cramped, contorted position that the Olympic gymnasts would have been envious of!
Garrett finally passed out on me at about three in the morning, and we migrated upstairs. I had had great plans to get up this morning around five so I could go running and get some work done before I had to take Chelsea to ballet. Of course, this plan greatly hinged on being able to go to bed early, which between having company over until eleven and having my very own three year old Kapuchin climbing all over my living room just didn't happen. I woke up at 9:00 still exhausted and wedged between my daughter, who crawled into my bed, kissed me on the lips and promptly passed back out, and my husband, who was starting to wake up and, in the way of people who have no respect for sleep, decided I should be awake too.
Needless to say, I was a little cranky when I finally realized what time it was, woke up my daughter and stumbled downstairs for some breakfast.
The beginnings of a huge headache and a bowl of finely ground Frosted Mini Wheats crumbs later, I was ready to get this show on the road. I was counting on having ten minutes in a nice, hot shower to pull myself back together, maybe taking a little time to spit shine my aura (which had to be pitch black by that point in time) and start feeling a little more human. I forgot one thing. My husband LOVES sharing the shower.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
Seriously. I'm a shameless shower hog. I HATE sharing my shower, even with the kids. I like to light a candle, crawl my half human, half alien morning self into the shower and just sit and broil for a little while. I don't have to share the hot water, I have room to stretch, and I can sing and talk to myself and meditate to my heart's content. Have you ever tried to channel energy through your chakra when you're half awake and someone's talking in your ears? It's enough to make a saint suicidal.
More importantly, in a house full of people my shower is the only ten minutes in a day I actually get to myself. I treasure that time. I can massage my scalp, shameless exfoliate my skin and enjoy ten minutes out of the day where I don't have to be anybody's mommy, anybody's wife or anybody's contractor. I can just be me, which (at the risk of sounding like a complete and utter emo) doesn't get to happen a whole lot these days between work, school and my family. Take that away from me and my day's already off to a rough start.
Throw in an overtired and whiny six year old who doesn't want to have to deal with putting on her tights for ballet and you've got an instant recipe for disaster. By the time I dropped her off at class (after a futile search for the shoe she lost last week that never did reappear), forced her into her old, slightly too-small back-up slippers and sent her in to class I wasn't fit company for man or beast.
Thank God for friends. I'm good friends with the father of one of the other dancers in Chelsea's class, and he took one look at me and just gave me a hug. I needed that. Just a simple, undemanding hug from a friend. Hugs moved on to coffee with the kiddies in tow, and a quick shot of caffeine and a bagel later I was feeling something close to human again. Of course, the quick dousing in the deluge that started coming down the minute we stepped out of the coffee shop might have helped. I love getting soaked in a summer storm, when it's hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk and the water's coming down nice and warm.
We were soaked by the time we got back to the studio, having promised the kids to send a car back for them, but it was so worth it.
Well, my stressed little mind was turning a mile a minute with my ten mile long to-do list after class (Yes, I spent ten whole minutes going through everything I was supposed to do today. Isn't that pathetic?) but was informed that the kids wanted to spend the afternoon together. My first instinct was to refuse-I had work to do, after all. But Chelsea's friend is going out of state soon and may be gone until we leave for New York, so I didn't have the heart.
I'm glad I didn't. We had some errands to run first, and let me tell you-there are some days when I'm SUCH a woman. I wanted to get Chelsea loaded up on dance stuff for next year, since I'm not sure how far away the nearest dance shop's going to be next year and don't want to spend August scrambling to find out, so we spent a small fortune at Walmart and Dancer's Wardrobe. Retail therapy. Nothing beats it.
Anyway, after coming home, tossing in a load of laundry and scrubbing the dirt out of her tights with a toothbrush so she'd have a clean pair for her recital tomorrow, Chelsea and I headed out for some fun with friends. Hey, there are some things more important that packing closets, right? We wound up watching some Mythbusters, busting some maggots and catching the middle of "Tomcats" before the kids announced they wanted to hit the pool.
Oh. My. God. I haven't had that much fun in forever. We had the girls tooling around the pool on their kickboards, and I've finally got Chelsea swimming! It was a big moment. We couldn't even get her off the ladder next year, so I was a little worried about my ability to fulfill my promise to have her swimming without a floatie this year. I shouldn't have been. She hit the water like a fish this year. She's finallys swimming! Oh, only for small stretches-one or two feet, tops, before her feet go down in the water. But she's doing it! I was so excited, and it was so great to actually have people to celebrate with. Then Chelsea's friend wanted to try swimming, and she's picking it up fast! I was impressed!
Four temper tantrums later we were out of the pool and on our way back to the house. I wound up bringing all of the kids home with me, and their dad showed up with the makings of cheesy french fries and chicken nuggets in tow. I could have wept at his feet in gratitude. We made up dinner, hooked the kids up with some popcorn and a movie and retreated upstairs with two plates of loaded french fries and the seventh season of Buffy. It was awesome. It was so nice to just spend a day hanging out, not desperately trying to work my butt off to fit 30 hours of "stuff" into 24 hours of day.
A half an hour of bonding time with a lavender candle, a microblog and two blog posts later (I post at the WitchSchool site as well) I'm feeling good, if exhausted from a day at the pool, and very, very ready for bed. I finally found a little peace. I think I'm going to drink up a little more, then head for bed. Tomorrow's going to be a very, very big day.
Peace out y'all.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Dude. Get over yourself. You quit Star Trek. Your movie career never happened. You have a wife. You have two beautiful stepchildren. Grow up and be grateful for what you have, and develop the talents that you do have rather than the ones that you don't. Child stars don't transition well. It's amazing how many child stars have found themselves in precisely that scenario. Find something else to do, and stop whining. Please.
All right, I feel better now. Sorry, I was packing this morning to the happy tune of Wil Wheaton, which normally should have made the experience exponentially less painful but in actually ended up just aggravating me. I can't stand it when people whine horrifically. I mean, I know I tend to sink down into the mires of self pity. I know it's easy for me to obsess about things that are past-the sting of not being able to finish Med Tech school still rears its ugly head and pokes me in the butt every once in a while. But really? Even I'm not that whiny. Get over yourself, see reality the way it really is rather than the way you wanat it to be.
Phew. All right, rant aside, I know I still owe you a blog about the Ren Faire, and it's coming, it really is. But ye olde muse just isn't feeling the VRF today. Maybe tomorrow. The sun will come out tomorrow, there's always tomorrow, and tomorrow...well, who knows. Right now I have to go finish getting my stuff together for tonight, when I finally get to watch my daughter dance her tarentella dance and enjoy my last night of being an uninvolved parent on the Virginia Ballet Scene before we move to New York and get to start the process all....over....again.
What about the stress of constantly finding work? The pressure of often unrealistic deadlines? The tension that comes from having to do your work to somebody else's satisfaction? Yes, writing is infinitely preferable to, say, being an accountant, but whoever says it isn't stressful is either doing it as a part time hobby or they're still living the nine to five and looking with envy at all the writers of the world sitting here, just like, putting their thoughts to paper while chilling in their pajamas and watching "Pink Panther".
As I was walking this morning in my neverending quest to lost hte weight that absolutely refuses to go anywhere and listening happily to Wil Wheaton's "Just a Geek" while rolling down to CVS on a quest for the appropriate hair "stuff" to do my daughter's hair for her dress rehearsal tonight, I was feeling pretty chill. I was thinking, "They're right. The only stress that goes along with my job is what I give it!" Realistically, however, even freelance writers only have 24 hours in a day.
That doesn't mean I'm ready to turn in my keyboard for a 9 to 5er, although the thought has occurred to me more than once in recent months that I would be a lot more relaxed if I could leave work at work and just come home and chill out. Then I think about the stress of finding a baby-sitter, and the aggravation of having to find someone to stay home with the kids when they're sick, and along with the vindictive feeling of justice that comes with knowing that my husband, who telecommutes, would finally get to know the joys of being a work at home parent (right know he's working out of his grandmother's spare bedroom, without the constant distraction of children who want to play, or go swimming, or go to the park, or do the myriad other things that children want to do on summer vacation) I think about how incredibly bored I would be.
So I realized. I really like being a writer. What I don't like doing is writing without feeling, by rote, with constant repetition. Somewhere along the way writing stopped being fun, and with it I felt like I was losing a piece of myself. So my promise? I said I was going to take this year and learn to enjoy my life, and six months into it I've already lost touch with that. I'm still wrapped up in the past, with a healthy dose of excuses for not making this reality everything I want it to be. I don't have time. It's too hard. I'm scared if I actually take that step and publish my own stuff with my own name on it people aren't going to like it, and I'm going to be a public failure.
Isn't it time I got over that? People are paying me a lot of money for my writing. In fact, I've been getting paid for my writing for the last two years. Obviously I have some smidgen, no matter how little, of talent. I think it might be time I said goodbye to fear and pride and started writing the way I've always done-with a little personality, and not like a mindless drone with nothing better to do.
Anyway, after making that promise to myself I guess it's time for me to take my pajama clad bottom upstairs and take a shower, and get ready for work. I think I'll slip on my comfy capris, and a light tee shirt, and curl up with my laptop at my brand new, newly acquired desk that so conveniently holds my schoolbooks underneath. I'll wrap up my newly found blogging addiction and go feel human so that when John comes by with Chelsea's ballet bag, which was left in his car and which I, in a move that all of those mothers who know the minute their child has left a piece of clothing anywhere would be appalled at, didn't even notice was missing, I'll be dressed and looking something like the professional I am.
My sister-in-law actually gave me an itemized list of everything her kids had left over here the last time they spent the night. I want to be her when I grow up.
Lolz. The Pink Panther wins again.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Friday, June 12, 2009
And today marks day 7 of Garrett's path to recovery after getting his tonsils and adenoids out. I swear, if I'd known teh poor kid was going to be so miserable I wouldn't have bothered! Okay, yeah, I probably would have (ENT said his tonsils were huge), but still. I would have been better prepared-and drafted backup for more than a couple of nights! As it is I haven't slept for more than 3 1/2 hours at a pop since Garrett's surgery, since we have to get up every four to dose him (which is always accompanied by plenty of righteous indignation). I'm pooped.
I'm supposed to be sitting down tonight to work on my final paper for my strategic marketing class, but I really don't feel like it. I so only accomplished half of what I wanted to do this week. I have grand ambitions of being able to take off the second half of July and the first half of August to help get this move taken care of. Of course, by take off I mean have my regular clientele caught up for about 4 weeks ahead of time, which is a great idea except for the part that with Garrett being as sick and miserable as he is I'm struggling just to get through what I HAVE to do in a day. Extra? Yah. Right.
So, a quick poll to all of you Twilight fans out there. Who hated the movie? Seriously? I loathed the movie, which isn't saying much when you consider the fact that I had to beg, lie and steal to get ahold of the book. I thought they butchered the book. Royally. So guess what? I'm now counting down until New Moon comes out in November.
Yes, I know. It's irrational. It's illogical. It just plain doesn't make sense! But there you have it. New Moon was, by far, my absolute favorite book of the Twilight quartet, probably because it made Bella much more three dimensional. She's heartbroken. She's shutting down. Then comes along this incredible man who pulls her out of her misery and puts her back on the straight and narrow. I love the way Stephanie Meyer portrays Bella's quest to get over Edward and move on with Jacob. She seemed so real here, much more so than she did in Twilight.
So yeah, in case you couldn't tell I was just a little pressed on New Moon. So now, even though intellectually I realize there's almost no chance that it's going to be better than the first I now almost have to go see it. I'm probably going to end up going to see it in the theatres. How pathetic is that?
I'm discovering that I really enjoy blogging. It's taking the pleasures of venting to a journal and slapping them up there for a live audience to see. No, it's not always witty, although I'm sure I could be if I wanted to. I don't want this to be a major publicity scene. This is the one place where I get to share my thoughts about politics, religion, movies, books, current events and my oh-so-boring life with everyone else out there.
Explain to me why we couldn't wait to grow up? When we were kids we couldn't wait to grow up and be adults. We had all these big plans for what we were going to do when we didn't have our parents staring over our shoulders. Now that we're adults, who can say they did half of what they said they were going to do as a child? I know I haven't. I still haven't gone any farther out of the states than Canada. I've never gone skydiving or white water rafting, and my significant other looked at me like I was crazy when I suggested it. Around here I'm the woman who cleans up the messes, puts away the laundry and occasionally escapes into glorious geekiness.
It's good to get to go online and be the zany, dorky and somewhat geeky woman I know I can be. Live long and prosper!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
No, not everyone in Hollywood is a druggie. Even I know that, and I'm probably the least pop culture proficient person I know. Not having cable will do that for you. That doesn't, however, stop many of them with living lives that seem to exist between rehab sessions. For Wil Wheaton, his drug of choice seems to be the arrogance of youth mixed in with the heady feeling of invulnerability and the unshakable belief in success that plagues us all through our twenties. That, at least, is a misstep I can respect!
So, to all you bookworms out there, and all the Trekkies that are holding back from picking up the book because Wil Wheaton's conversion from backseat actor to budding author just seems too, well, wierd, jump on the bandwagon and pick up a copy of Just a Geek. You can buy it online. You can pick it up in the bookstore. You can even download a copy of it from Amazon for your Kindle (like that isn't the coolest invention EVER!). Just get it, read it. I promise, you'll feel better about yourself, your future, your past and your sense of humor when you do.
Monday, June 8, 2009
When did fun stop being necessary?!?
I want to do something wild and crazy, just for the fun of it. I want to paint my face and dance in the rain and wear pigtails in public and sing at the top of my lungs and do all sorts of things I'm supposed to be too old and too mature to do, just because they're fun. I want to write about all the funny things my kids did today just for the fun of it and not because someone's expecting an e-mail (but oh, you should have seen Garrett trying to row across his baby pool in a plastic Halloween candy bowl!).
I want to go out and do the craziest thing I can find to do, just for the fun of it. Let's hear it for growing up.
Saturday, June 6, 2009
In other words, do you reach a point where you've lived with someone so long the two of you just stop being friends and turn into blissfully oblivious roommates? Or is that friendship a rock solid foundation on which you build? And do the people you love ever really see you, or do they only see what they want to see?
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Always in a hurry, always rushing, always fussing,
To do what must be done.
Why can't I just have fun?
Thirty six, forty eight, seventy two hours in a day.
What do you mean there's twenty four?
I must have more, more, more, more!
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Anyway, sentimentality aside, I'm on my way to my nephew's school play tonight. It promises to be interesting-Kolby REALLY doesn't want to do it, so it should be an experience! Everyone keep their fingers crossed!
Monday, May 11, 2009
Then again, if I'm not qualified, who is? I was talking to a friend I like to use for a sounding board for my writing, both because she used to work for a publisher and because she shares MOST of my taste in books, and when I asked her to read through the first chapter of a short story I'm getting ready to submit she said I was probably more qualified than she was at this point. It feels wierd to be acknowledged as a professional-and yet, what else have I been doing for the past few years?
Anyway, my own personal demons aside, it's going to be a red letter day around here. My youngest son got a tooth pulled this morning. We knew it was coming, we just weren't expecting it to be today! We went in planning on having an exam and came home missing a tooth! Not to mention the fact that the season finale of House airs tonight. I'm a little afraid. I hate the fact that they've left Kutner's suicide hanging, and the whole House/Cuddy thing is just a little too creepy for me. They've always been friends. Making it romantic is just-odd. But anyway, it promises to be a good one. Check out the preview for the season 5 finale of House M.D. here:
Biggest shock in House history? They've killed Kutner, engaged Cameron and Chase, killed Amber, almost killed House, almost sent House to jail, shown that House was his mother's illegitimate son...there's a lot of competition there!
Monday, April 20, 2009
(Sorry Will, it had to be done!)
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Since none of this change is set in stone yet I'm not going to post the details here. They'll be forthcoming when commitments are made. (Since I haven't told many people about this yet it just seems smarter.) Suffice it to say that at the moment people with the courage to follow Billy Crystal's advice and view their life as a blank slate on which the ending hasn't yet been written have my utmost respect. That's what I'm trying to do, and I can tell you-it's scary!
"You can't change the past; the beginning's already written; but you can certainly step in in the middle and change the end."
Friday, February 13, 2009
Day 1: Walk 15 min., Run 1 min., Walk 2 min.
Day 2: Walk 5 min. Run 3 min. Repeat for 21 min.
Day 3: Walk 15 min., Run 1 min., Walk 2 min.
Day 4: Walk 5 min. Run 3 min. Repeat for 21 min.
Day 5: Walk 15 min., Run 1 min., Walk 2 min.
On the flip side, we're also taking acai berry for a test run. We'll so if it lives up to its hype. I was extremely lucky and got a great deal on a month's supply, so we'll be able to give it a quick run and see how it lives up to its press. If it doesn't, well, I'm out 30 bucks. If it does it might become a new addition to my permanent diet-like I don't pop enough pills in a day.
Anyway, I need to detack from the Buffy (which I've been watching way to much of for the past few days) and get back to work. I'm hoping to be able to take Valentine's Day off, but we'll see if it happens :-)
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
On a related note, I'm on day 3 of the walk run thing and my side isn't killing me. Granted, 15-20 min. of exercise a day is only a fraction of the exercise I get through the summer, but still. I'm sure it's too early to be excited, but I'm getting there. I might actually be able to run a 5K again before I die! Woohoo!
So, in a totally unrelated note, my Advance for Medical Laboratory Professionals magazine came today, and I had to completely geek out. I found a really cool article though. It was meant to be a motivator for Med Lab Techs telling the origins of the Iditarod (which, in case anyone is interested, is a dog sled race that covers over 1500 in 10 days) and how the teams were racing to get medicine and immunizations to diptheria patients. It was cool.
And it's Tuesday and still no House. I'm about to write Amazon and complain-the idea behind getting a T.V. pass was so that I WOULDN'T have to wait a week for Fox to post the epi, and they keep waiting longer and longer. I know, there's a big difference between 48 hours and 8 days (as I'm reminded of every time a new epi of "Bones" comes out), but I have no patience when it comes to House. With Stargate SG-1 off the air House is my latest obsession. *sigh*
Well, off to bed. I have to clean house tomorrow, so I'm hoping to be able to get up and knock work out before the baby goes to speech therapy (and I head to the gym). Good night all!
**Check this link out-this is a really cool idea! Our hospital does something like this in the ER for wanna-be nurses and techs**
Monday, February 9, 2009
So, I'd like to offer some congratulations to my friend Courtney, the newly degreed Dr. Silverthorn. A PhD at the age of 27! We're all very proud of her. This is shaping up to be a major year-my friend Katie O'Brien will be graduating from Cornell University Law School this May, and my brother in law James will be graduating from VA Tech out in Blacksburg. Wow. I can't remember the last time we had this many graduations in a year.
And my little brother just got engaged! I was shocked to hear the news, although I can't say I'm surprised. (Does that make sense?) So now I have two brothers getting married soon. Yikes I feel old.
Tackled the second day of my walk/run program, and so far I'm feeling good. Granted, it's not like I'm working very hard, but that was the point. My side doesn't hurt. I think I finally figured out what the problem was though. My youngest son decided to go crowd surfing off the top of the kitchen table shortly after my last surgery, and I know I popped a few stitches. That's probably why I'm having such a hard time getting back in shape.
Anyway, it's House night, so I need to get back to work.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
Last year I had gallbladder surgery, and I don’t know what they did but now every time I try to exercise more vigorously than a leisurely walk I nearly double over. It stinks. I’ve been trying to stick to the same training regimen I used when I was healthy to get back in shape though, and I think that might be the problem. I’m overdoing it before my body has time to get used to it, which was fine when I was healthy but impossible for my post-surgical self.
So I decided tonight that I’m just going to suck it up and look into one of the walk/run programs designed for people who are obese. It means a nice, slow transition back into running, but should ultimately have the same effect. I’m going to post my schedule at the beginning of every week, not only to remind myself (me and my 5 min. memory) but also so that when I’m whining later in the week you know what I’m talking about!
Here’s what this week’s going to look like:
Sunday-Walk 15 min at a varied pace
Monday-Walk 5 min. Run 1. Repeat ad nauseum for a total of 17 minutes. Walk 5 minutes.
Tuesday-Walk 15 minutes at a varied pace.
Wednesday-Walk 5 minutes. Run 1. Repeat ad nauseum for 17 minutes, then spend 5 minutes walking to cool down.
Thursday-Walk 15 minutes at a varied pace.
Friday-Walk 5 minutes. Walk 1. Repeat. 17 minutes. 5 minute cool down.
Is it going to work? We’ll see. I’m hopeful. I may never compete again, but if I can manage to sneak in a 30 minute run every morning without keeling over in pain I know I’d be a lot happier.
In other news, chocolate is my friend. Trapped in the throes of a chocolate craving for which there is no explanation other than spending way too much time at Alum Springs with the Blosser family today, I felt it was my duty as a friend and as someone with some medical experience (albeit limited) to share with you the potential health benefits of (dark) chocolate that make me feel much less guilty about the number of calories I just consumed:
1) Dark chocolate contains antioxidants that slow the aging process (nearly 8 times the amount found in strawberries, or so they say).
2) Dark chocolate has flavinoids, which help relax your blood pressure.
3) Dark chocolate has been shown to balance out hormone levels in the body, making it the perfect choice for…well, you know.
4) Dark chocolate stimulates endorphins in the pleasure center of the brain, helping you de-stress.
5) Dark chocolate contains serotonin, a natural anti-depressant.
2008 in a Nutshell
1.What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before? Wrote a press release. If I had only known then what I know now…
2. Did you keep your New Years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don’t like New Year’s resolutions, but I seem to remember at some point swearing I was never going to eat Indian cuisine again. So far, that one’s managed to stick!
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Josh and Rebecca, and lots of other people who I never get to see but who I send best cyberwishes to as often as possible.
4. Did anyone close to you die? I don’t remember. Isn’t that sad? In my defense, I’ve lost all of my grandparents in the past couple of years, and the time surrounding that has blurred a little bit.
5. What countries did you visit? Stayed in the U.S., although my neighbors shared an authentic El Salvadorean experience as often as possible.
6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? Patience, fingernails and a four bedroom house. Am I going to get any of them? The verdict’s not in yet.
7. What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? April 10th. Fill your house with eighteen screaming preschoolers, a sandbox, a bubble machine and an authentic ball pit and you won’t have to ask why I remember it.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Finishing my med lab coursework and enrolling for my advanced BS degree in public relations.
9. What was your biggest failure? Hmmm. That’s a loaded question. I don’t know, to be honest. Probably gaining back a good bit of the weight I lost when I was sick last year b/c of too much overtime and an addiction to Mt. Dew. One or the other is fine, but the two together spell catastrophe with a capital C.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? A nasty bout of the flu that joined hands with strep and pneumonia to do the end zone dance. Otherwise, nothing new.
11. What was the best thing you bought? My corduroy overalls.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? My children.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? The government. Seriously. It has to be pretty bad before I start talking politics when I’m not at work, but between Iraq and the slam to the economy I just can’t walk away.
14. Where did most of your money go? Rent, groceries, gas and kids. Yeah, that about covers it!
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Going back to school and the release of Patricia Brigg’s new book. Yes, I’m a geek.
16. What song will always remind you of 2008? Anything by Thalia or Jesus Adrian Romero.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
i. happier or sadder? Happier
ii. thinner or fatter? Fatter-but considering I’d just had gall bladder surgery I’m not sure that counts!
iii. richer or poorer? Richer.
18. What do you wish you'd done more of? Going swimming.
19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Stressing.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? Our Christmas tradition never changes. Christmas Eve dinner with my husband’s family, then Santa comes to visit and the kiddies stay up ‘til three in the morning. Christmas Day we go to my parents’ for their Christmas party, then roll home around midnight to sleep for at least twelve hours.
22. Did you fall in love in 2008? Every time I looked at my children.
23. How many one-night stands? I had a one night stand with Buffy the Vampire Slayer before I remembered I don’t really care for the show when there are other things on t.v. Does that count?
24. What was your favorite TV program? House and Bones-thanks Amy.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? No, although there are a few people I’m more disappointed in.
26. What was the best book you read? The Mercy Thompson series, Grave Bones and everything I read and re-read by Nora Roberts.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Ohhh, let’s see. Probably Taylor Swift, Westlife and Jesus Adrian Romero.
28. What did you want and get? Fleeting moments of pure, unadulterated happiness.
30. What was your favorite film of this year? Kung Fu Panda.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? Had Chinese take-out, cooed over the flowers my husband and daughter bought me and didn’t wash the dishes. 26.
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Taking more time to smell the roses.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008? Was it comfy? Did it match? Did it not make me look like a kewpie doll? Sold.
34. What kept you sane? The Hispanic Ministry at my church.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? David Boreanaz.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? Abortion and cuts in children’s healthcare and Medicaid programs.
37. Who did you miss? Everyone I didn’t see….some of them twice.
38. Who were the best new people you met? We don’t have that much time. If I met you in 2008, let me just say that it’s been an honor.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008. It doesn’t matter how hard you try to run from it, sooner or later you’re going to get hurt. Life’s too short for regrets. Don’t regret that you never lived.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. “Tengo razones pa vivir, tengo canciones pa escribir, tengo una voz y un corazón. Tengo un camino pa seguir, tengo un amor pa compartir…”
Whatever the reason, unlike most years I've found myself caught in the whirl of post-New Year's resolutions. I usually avoid New Year's resolutions like the plague, because I know that I'm never going to be able to keep them. As the infamous Dr. Greg House says, "If you want to do something, you do it. You don't wait for a sound bite." I've always kind of figured New Year's was that sound bite, and a sound bite isn't enough reason to do anything.
This year, however, I'm jumping on the bandwagon. Want to guess what my New Year's resolution is going to be? (Yes, I know I'm a month or two late...life moves on, you know!) This year I'm going to learn to appreciate the moments in my life that take my breath away. I have a wonderful, loving husband and three beautiful children, a fantastic group of friends and a career that, although it drives me crazy some days, gives me a wonderful opportunity to expand my horizons while doing a job I love.
I've spent too much time in the past year dwelling on what might have been. The only thing that dwelling on what's not going to happen changes is me. I'm tired of it. It's time to let go. Those of you who know me know what I'm talking about. Those of you who don't, but are reading this blog anyway, let me share with you the most important thing I've learned this year.
Time doesn't stop just because things aren't the way you thought they'd be three, five or even ten years ago. Your life is what you make it, and each new day is the beginning of a brand new adventure. Whether you are friends, clients or simply people looking for something to laugh about today, I hope when you're done reading this that you'll shut down your computer, pick up the phone and call someone you haven't spoken to in a decade. Take your kids outside to play in the snow. Kiss your husband or wife like it's the first time, not the fiftieth. Do something silly, something you could never in a million years imagine yourself doing.
It doesn't matter what anyone says, we don't get any second chances. This one life, this one time around, is all we've got. Don't forget to take the time to look for the moments that take your breath away. I know I'm going to.